I have to say the one of the things that bother me the most is when I see a girl look in the mirror, (or even when she's not) put herself down. People tell her she's cute, and all she can focus on are her flaws. People tell her she's beautiful, she just shakes it off, and focuses on her flaws. I've known quite a few people do that to themselves, and it's really saddening to me.
Now, it's not to say that I don't understand as to why some of them do that. Believe me, I used to be kind of the same way. In late elementary school, middle school, and a small part of High School, my self esteem about myself was pretty bad. I really didn't think I was pretty, and was worried that no one would think I was beautiful. I had some pretty difficult emotional struggles for more than one reason; and, what I thought about myself was one of those things. I've struggled with my weight for basically my whole life. I've never really been skinny like most of my classmates growing up.
But when I got into high school, things started changing for me. While high school was, for the most part, pretty rough on me, I started gaining some lessons, and a different perspective of myself little by little. I had been studying my bible a lot more, and talking to different people. Finally, my eyes began to open, and I had a new perspective on myself.
Sure, I've had some people in the past make fun of my weight (and some have even called me ugly.). But, you know, I realize that it really doesn't matter what those people said. It sometimes hurts to remember some of that, but, it doesn't plague me like it used to. That's because certain things started coming to my attention.
The first thing to remember is that God made you. He crafted you with His bare hands in your mother's womb. He knew you, and who you would be from that very moment of conception. Psalm 139:13-16 says:
“For You have formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise You, for I am fearfully, and wonderfully made. Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them.” (ESV)
Also, Girls, we're a creation that He's very proud of. In Genesis chapter 2, we read that God had made woman from one of Adam's ribs. He then brought us to the man as a gift! Is that not special or what? We're a gift to humanity! That fact makes us so special in God's eyes. We're a creation that He was proud of. These facts mean that He thinks we're beautiful. We're His creation, after all. To others, we may be just like everyone else, but, to God we're special. As Abraham Lincoln once said, “God must love the common man, He made so many of them.”
We must also realize that who we are is more important than what we look like. 1st Peter 3:3-4 says:
“Do not let your adornment be merely outward-arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel-rather, let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” (NKJV)
Now, this verse isn't saying that it's wrong to look pretty (notice the word “merely”), but the apostle Peter is saying that in the sight of God, beauty on the inside matters more than what we do on the outside. That needs to be our top priorty; working on who we are as a person, rather than our physical appearance.
As young women, we need to go against the ideals of society on what “makes” you “pretty”. For instance, people like Miley Cyrus thinks that it's cool to dance on a pole. Lady GaGa thinks that dressing in crazy and immodest outfits is beautiful. We need to realize that these kinds of things DON'T make us beautiful. As I mentioned in my last article, these things can actually degrade your self esteem. They can make you feel good for a short time, but the truth is that over time, it can make you feel less and less good about yourself.
When you trust God with all your being, and strive to live for Him the best you can, you really do start to see yourself in a different way. You start feeling more confident, and you don't really see yourself as ugly. You see yourself as a creation of God, His beautiful, wonderful princess-and you're proud to be so.
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Here are some extra suggestions to help boost your confidence:
-Pray without ceasing!
-Try to find your own style of dressing that is modest. Don't dress in a certain way just because other people are and because you seek to impress others. This will deplete your self-esteem even more.
-Find a way to remind yourself everyday that you're special because you're God's.
-Dress in clothes that fit properly and are flattering.
-Do something fun and spontaneous-Like putting on some fun, upbeat songs in your room, and dancing crazily! (LOL, trust me, it works!)
-Thank God for creating you!
-Accept compliments given to you with a thank you, and a smile.
Uplifting Quote:
“There could never be a more beautiful you. Don't buy the lies, disguises and hoops they make you jump through. You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do. There could never be a more beautiful you.” -Johnny Diaz, “More Beautiful You”.
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